wonderful words

You may well be wondering why on earth anyone would post a list of words as the first entry in a new Blog. Why not?

Is it that my ailing puter is dying on me by refusing to backup data to CD? Why not upload a year or two of saved words here and quit stressing over it Dave? I know, I know, the print button is right there, so pop a hard copy in the top left hand drawer and be done with it. Noooooo, not quite anal enough for me dont ya know.

Could it be I was raised, educated and almost encouraged to be a monoglot (see list)in a very 'blue collar' town and now regret my early 'Teflon' attitude towards words and language?

Is it just a sign of impending senescence (see list) and wrinklyhood?

Could it be the influence of that weird lecturer guy? You know the one who took us for Plumbing Craft II at Charlie Trev's Tech College in Newcastle. Always spent his first ten minutes of every class extolling the virtues and benefits of 'word power' to a less than enthusiastic audience.

Might it be inspiration gained from reading Mark Morford's columns , 'The Morning Fix' or his later effort, 'Notes & Errata' at SF Gate that brought about my edacious (see list) interest in words?

Or is it just a life long career in engineering, being largely based around precision, mathematics and fact, that created a desire for expression in a less technical and structured format - flowing and ever evolving.

Be it one or all of the above, it's my Blog so I can pretty well do as I please for once, HTML Gods permitting that is. Speaking of which, Mike in LA never did return my HTML for Dummies book.

During the composition of this first frivolous entry I realize the folly of my wordy ways. Let me explain. I enjoy words. Why? just because, so I keep a list of interesting examples on my home puter for reference. I decided to enter the Blogworld and post the list for whatever reason.
In doing so the engineer in me prods me firmly in the side reminding me that, with a little manipulation on my part, it may be possible to link back to the list of words whenever one appears in a future post, thereby giving you, the reader, the benefit of an instant dictionary.
Here's the rub. To achieve this goal I more than likely have to spend untold hours messing with the composition editor, help forums and HTML code which, correct me if I'm wrong, amounts to yet another engineering task, does it not?
So Hello ! light-bulb, I'm right back to where I was before I got started with my diversionary list of words in the first place. Ho Hum.

Although my interest in the written word far outweighs my ability to document it accurately I still firmly subscribe to the sentiments of the following quote:

"Typos are very important to all written form. It gives the reader something to look for so they aren't distracted by the total lack of content in your writing."

- Randy K. Milholland

and as a result make no further apologies for grammatical or otherwise unintentional errors in future posts. Consider this my coverall Britopian disclaimer.

With my particular Britopian disdain for the current 'Bush Brigade' and the 'US Administration' in general, you may well find that the usage examples associated with the following list contain a certain political bias. Really! While making no claim to authorship or originality of the text I do find them amusing and supportive of my political stance. I hope you do to.

And with that back to you Brian in the studio.

abulia noun
abnormal lack of ability to act or to make decisions
"Since his college graduation, my son seems to be suffering from abulia - he just can't decide what he wants to do next,"

acclivity
An ascending slope
"It is our sincere hope this adorable wittle commuter train will help all Vermonters endure the mild acclivities and gentle downward slopes of their daily lives with comfort and ease and lots of swell cuteness."

aleatory adj
depending on an uncertain event or contingency
relating to luck and especially to bad luck
characterized by chance or random elements
"The aleatory nature of a lottery drawing makes it impossible to predict who is going to be the winner".

algolagnia
A perversion (as sadism or masochism) characterized by pleasure and especially sexual gratification in inflicting or suffering pain
algolagniac - noun
"You may call it rampant cultural algolagnia, but I simply call it the Bush/Cheney energy policy."

amicron
One of the smallest microscopically detectable particles
"The sole remaining amicron of Mr. Cheney's sense of humanity is only detectable when you show him pictures of suffering military warheads."

anarthria
Loss of the motor ability that enables speech
anarthric - adj
"And then Lynne jus stood there, gasping and grinning, utterly speechless, giddy as a schoolgirl on meth, very nearly anarthric, quivering and goosebumped all over her oatmealy skin, as the big tanks rolled by in front of her, their big long cannons resplendent and gleaming, the rumble making her thigh flesh jiggle. "

anfractuous
Full of windings and intricate turnings: tortuous
"I only wish we had a leader who could engage a little more deeply with the anfractuous intricacies of the problems, rather than talking like a B-grade cowboy."

anodyne adj
serving to alleviate pain
not likely to offend or arouse tensions : innocuous
"Afraid of seeming overly critical,the new coach would only offer a few anodyne suggestions."

ataractic
Relating to or producing calmness and peace of mind:tranquilizer
ataractic or ataraxic - adj
"When I feel particularly sinful and guilt-ridden over just being alive, I like to go duckpin bowling for Jesus. It has the most wondrous ataractic effect on my misguided soul."

aperient
Gently moving the bowels:
a laxative aperient - noun
"Whenever I feel, you know, *blocked*, I crank up the Julio Iglesias. Before I know it I'm dashing for the restroom. His voice has the most wonderful aperient effect."

apercu ap-er-SOO noun
a brief survey or sketch : outline
an immediate impression; especially : insight
"He holds the reader's attention with his artful essays woven with entertaining anecdotes and wry apercus."

asthenia
Lack or loss of strength: debility
"I tell you judge, I see the pretty ladies in the skimpy little dresses and I cannot help it, I must grab. It is a strange asthenia I suffer at the sight of such lovely tush. What can I say? I'm Italian."

bloviate verb
to speak or write verbosely and windily
"Maggie liked to turn on the news and watch the media pundits bloviate about the top issues of the day."

brummagem adj
not genuine : spurious; cheaply showy : tawdry
"The jewelry box in Penelope's grandmother's closet was filled with brummagem costume jewelry."

cadre noun
framework : a central unit especially of trained personnel able to assume control and train others: a group of people with a unifying relationship
"NASA's cadre of courageous astronauts offered America the modern-day heroes it needed."

campestral adj
of or relating to fields or open country : rural
"The campestral scenery surrounding Reginald's new home inspired him to take up landscape painting."

captious adj
marked by an often ill-natured inclination to stress faults and raise objections: calculated to confuse, entrap, or entangle in argument
"The teacher often deliberately asked captious questions to get the students debating."

capricious adj
governed or characterized by sudden, impulsive, and seemingly unmotivated ideas or actions : unpredictable
"Given his capricious nature, Irving is more likely to go wherever the road takes him than follow any scripted plan."

coterie
an intimate and often exclusive group of persons with a unifying common interest or purpose.
"Dorothy Parker belonged to a literary coterie known as the Algonquin Round Table, whose members were legendary for their terse, acerbic writing."

cachinnate
To laugh loudly or immoderately
cachinnation - noun
"And then right in the middle of the smirky strategy meeting in the War Room, Lynne Cheney suddenly squealed and giggled and then cachinnated hysterically as it was revealed that Johnny Ashcroft was tickling her mounds of demon-crusted cellulite with a large eagle feather under the table."

caliginous
Misty, dark
"Spymaster Vladimir says we must first make the room all gloomy and caliginous before he will exchange dirty pictures of US leaders for vodka and cash."

canaille
Rabble, riffraff
"It pleases me greatly that my books are finally reaching the lowly and miserable -- how do you say -- the canaille of France."

cark
To burden or be burdened with trouble; worry
carking - adj; burdensome, annoying
"Working diligently to reinforce her image as a heavily shellacked carking harridan pit-viper, Lynne Cheney proceeded to very loudly dry-hump the Gideon Bible all throughout the congressional hearing, causing these weird scraping noises that gave everyone the chills."

cernuous
Nodding; drooping
"In the sauna it is very impolite to point to other people's possible cernuous appendages and giggle, even in Finland."

chthonic
Of or relating to the underworld.

contumacious
Stubbornly disobedient: rebellious
contumaciously - adverb
"But I don't wanna take a nap yet, uncle Dick!" said junior, contumaciously. "I wanna go play T-ball on the lawn with Cal Ripken!"

coprophagous
Feeding on dung
coprophagy - noun
example: Lynne Cheney.

corybantic
Like or in the spirit of a Corybant; esp; wild, frenzied, delirious, frantic, frenetic
"And just when the two hot young Wiccan lesbians on "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" kissed, Lynne Cheney let out a piercing screeching howl and fell into yet another fit of adorable corybantic spasms, crying out for her Johnny Ashcroft, love sausage, to come medicate her and tell her it's all right, the world is still run by pale sniveling overweight rich white impotent men. "

borborygmus
Intestinal rumbling caused by moving gas
"It was an audible gurgle, a shocking borborygmus that woke Dick from a nice dream of nuclear armageddon in the middle of the night, as he realized Lynney must've been eagerly licking the toxic sweat from Ashcroft's brow again."

desultory adj
marked by lack of definite plan, regularity, or purpose: not connected with the main subject: disappointing in progress, performance, or quality
"His studies are very desultory and eccentric, but he has amassed a lot of out-of-the-way knowledge which would astonish his professors."

defalcate
To misuse funds; to engage in embezzlement
defalcator - noun
"Let Mr. Rich's famous and now notorious tax evasion and defalcation be a lesson to all you future MBAs: Switzerland rocks!"

demulcent
Serving to soothe or soften
"I've found playing softball with young girls has a refreshingly demulcent effect on my aggressive young male tendencies," said the 16-year-old boy, staring lustily at the 17-year-old pitcher of his team, who popped her gum and rolled her eyes and looked away, barely registering his pathetic existence."

detumescence
Reduction or lessening of a swelling, especially the restoration of a swollen organ or part to normal size.
detumescent - adjective
"It's this constant cycle of painful tumescence and detumescence in certain entirely unpleasant parts of his body for poor Mr. Ashcroft as he watches looped reruns of the Mr Universe pageant on ESPN2 alone in his bunker with just a nice lavender tea."

deuteragonist noun
the actor taking the part of second importance in a classical Greek drama OR a person who serves as a foil to another
"She cut such an extraordinary figure that it was easy to overlook the fact that she was ... a deuteragonist rather than a main player."

edacious adj
having a huge appetite : ravenous : excessively eager : insatiable
"Fiona, an edacious reader, completed a book every few days and usually had begun her next one before she had finished her last."

egregious
conspicuous; especially : conspicuously bad
"The armchair commentators at the office spent their coffee break grousing about the egregious errors of judgment they felt had been made by the coach of the losing team."

emprise
an adventurous, daring, or chivalric enterprise
"As a boy, Will spent hours in the library reading adventure stories featuring brave heroes who embarked on dangerous and exciting emprises."

eristic adj
characterized by disputatious and often subtle and specious reasoning
"Scott grew tired of the eristic arguments his friend put forth and refused to discuss the issue further."

echinate
Bearing or covered with spines or bristles; prickly
"And then the king of the fiery hell-spawn reached in and yanked out the tiny black echinate heart of A G Ashcroft and held it aloft for all to see, and the hordes did gasp and kneel and cheer. "

edulcorate
To free from harshness (as of attitude): make pleasant; to sweeten
edulcorative - adj
"Attempts to improve if not edulcorate President Cheney's disposition by way of exposing him to pictures of kittens and cute puppies only seem to have made him increasingly wan and disturbing as he keeps repeating the word 'yummy' in this creepy voice when he looks at the poodles."

effluvium
A usually invisible emanation or exhalation, as of vapor or gas.
A byproduct or residue; waste.
The odorous fumes given off by waste or decaying matter.
An impalpable emanation; an aura

effodient
Burrowing; digging up
"Mr. Rumsfeld's apparent giggly and effodient tendencies when faced with a big pile of military spending monies should not be confused with orgiastic bliss, primarily because that is just one very unpleasant mental image."

eloign
To take (oneself) far away
To remove to a distant or unknown place: conceal
"I like to luxuriate in the Soda Springs and let my mind sort of eloign itself as the carbon monoxide seeps in and refreshes my soul and destroys precious brain tissue."

emetic
Causing vomiting.
An agent that causes vomiting.
emetically - adv

eructation
An act or instance of belching
"Following the ingestion of a large glass of milk tea full of gooey tapioca balls, a long, loud eructation can be most satisfying and also obnoxious."

esculent
Suitable for eating; edible.
esculent - noun
"Not only is vaguely creepy heavily sugared artificially flavored gelatin deliciously esculent, it makes a fine symbol for what Utah really stands for."

eudaemonism
A theory that the highest ethical goal is happiness and personal well-being
eudaemonist - noun; eudaemonistic - adj
"It is my personal belief, and my husband's too, that all forms of bliss and sexiness and sensuality and inherent soulful joy and any tendencies toward and sense of overall eudaemonistic bliss should be immediately and henceforth replaced by bitter homophobia, war, a deep groping nauseating love of old rich white men, and regular enemas featuring Xanax and Neil Sedaka," Lynne Cheney told to a group of stunned and permanently scarred preschoolers, as they all sat there, crying silently. "

evulsion
Act of extraction or tearing out
evulse - verb
"Sometimes President Cheney finds it just terribly difficult to evulse the rather unpleasant thoughts of how much his little Shrub likes to sit in his lap and hear fantastical stories about how the oil barons will eventually colonize Mars."

execrate verb
to declare to be evil or detestable : denounce
to detest utterly
"The new governor publicly execrated corruption in all its forms, and promised that her administration would be beyond reproach."

exiguous
Excessively scanty: inadequate
exiguously - adv
exiguousness - noun
"So's Ralphie says to me, you pays me woeful or exiguous amounts of proper homage, I find a nice coffin for you's at the bottom of da lake, capiche?"

fantod
A state of irritability and tension: fidgets
An emotional outburst: fit
"Poor Ms. Abernathy suffered a severe case of irritable bowels and the fantods whenever little Elian came on screen. Plus she thought the that one cousin chick was really hot."

facinorous
Extremely wicked
"President Cheney's attitude toward women and gays and the environment and war could be called vile, small-minded and facinorous, but that would be far too flattering."

flabellate
Shaped like a fan
"C'mere and let me flabellate your cumwagger, you purbellied lubstinger!" murmured a mysteriously inebriated John Ashcroft, rubbing his nipples and ogling Laura Bush's stiff conservative beige A-line skirt while badly misusing 'flabellate'. "I can see your ankles, baby. Mmmm."

fimetic
Pertaining to dung
fimicolous - living in dung
"Our yummy microwaveable smoked pork brisket tips are a delicious taste-treat for the fast-paced family on the go. Please ignore the many fimetic ingredients which we have renamed 'natural flavorings.'"

frisson
A brief moment of emotional excitement: shudder, thrill
"When Ms Rowling mentioned using her millions to start a campaign to lobotomize all those who think her books promote Satanism, a frisson of giggly terror ran through crowd."

gorgonize
To have a paralyzing or mesmerizing effect on: stupefy, petrify
"I no longer have to think, act, contemplate, or fantasize for myself anymore, as the Mormon church gorgonized my life but only in the most wonderful way and I'm not just saying that because they'll probe me with pointy things and make me inbreed again if I don't."

gormandize
To eat gluttonously or ravenously
gormandizer - noun
"Essentially what we're seeing on these 1.5 million hidden cameras is a whole lot of Brits wandering around sighing, picking off lint, gormandizing shepherd's pie, and getting utterly plastered at the pub."

gulosity
Excessive appetite: greediness
"Mrs. Cheney's apparent desire for and gulosity regarding obscure German fetish porn should not be taken as indicating that she does not still believe that gay people are totally icky."

harridan
A vicious, scolding woman; a shrew
"If you don't stroke little digital Pam's ego by complimenting her breasts every day, she turns into a real harridan and will threaten to erase your address book."

habiliment noun
characteristic apparatus : trappings, the dress characteristic of an occupation or occasion -- usually used in plural , clothes
"His own figure, in spite of his mean habiliments, assumed an air of state and grandeur."

haptic adj
relating to or based on the sense of touch
"Mark could tell the different kinds of yarn apart purely by haptic clues."

harbinger noun
one that pioneers in or initiates a major change : precursor
one that presages or foreshadows what is to come
"More often than not, robins are year-round residents...let hummingbirds and orioles be your harbingers of spring."

hebetude
Lethargy, dullness hebetudinous - adj
"The creepy part is, the more excited and happily war-drunk President Cheney gets, the more wan and sickly and hebetudinous he appears."

henotic
Promoting harmony or peace
"If Uncle Dick says we can spin the childish T-ball gimmick into a henotic PR ploy while we sneak hundreds of vile environmental abuses under the cultural radar, I believe him because I am the president, and stuff."

hircine
Of or characteristic of a goat, especially in strong odor
"I'd say something about how a certain Australian long-jumper, given the drool and the particularly rank hircine emanations, has probably had one too many intimate relations with certain wooly member of the animal kingdom. But I won't."

horrisonant
Making horrible sound
"Then when he discovered the Easter-egg hunt had been called off due to rain, Shrub started pouting and made this horrisonant puling sound and demanded that Cheney hide some eggs in the Oval Office for him to find."

hypaethral
partly or entirely open to the sky

importunate
Troublesomely urgent: overly persistent in request or demand
importunately - adv
importunateness - noun
"Then we became clearly agitated and importunate when we switched from shots of iced Stoli to lukewarm Wild Turkey. I mean, can you blame them?"

incubus.
An evil spirit believed to descend upon and have sexual intercourse with women as they sleep.
A nightmare. An oppressive or nightmarish burden.

indigence noun
a level of poverty in which real hardship and deprivation are suffered and comforts of life are wholly lacking
"It is a fine thing, reader, to be lifted in a moment from indigence to wealth." (Charlotte Bronte, Jane Eyre)

inimical adj
being adverse often by reason of hostility or malevolence
having the disposition of an enemy : hostile
reflecting or indicating hostility : unfriendly
"When he called the company's help line, Jared was startled by the cold, inimical voice of the customer service representative."

invaginate
enclose, sheathe
To fold in so that an outer becomes an inner surface
"And then Lynne would do this bizarre trick wherein she would somehow invaginate Rummy's entire head into the folds of her copious thigh flesh, and he would giggle and squirm and sigh".

inveigle
To win over by wiles: entice
To acquire by ingenuity or flattery
inveiglement - noun; inveigler - noun
"And then Lynne Cheney ripped off her girdle and mounted Mr. Wolfowitz right there on the dinner table and closed her eyes tight and began bucking like a deranged salivating bronco in heat, screaming "inveigle! inveigle! inveigle!" until she passed out. No one is quite sure what the hell she meant. "

irenic
Favoring, conducive to, or operating toward peace, moderation, or conciliation
irenically - adverb
"I gotcher whithering hopes for a positive luminous soul-enervating irenic change in global military and environmental policy right here, suckers!" screeched Dick Cheney to a very large planet of deeply saddened but still hopeful people who were just sort of staring at him, and sighing, and shaking their heads, as the VP grabbed his crotchal area and grunted and made Lynney swoon and the very air recoil. "

jentacular
Pertaining to breakfast
"It is one of Mr. Cheney's fun early morning jentacular habits to pull out the map of the world and point to some small struggling country and see if we can't figure out a way to enslave everyone there without anyone knowing."

labile
Readily or continually undergoing chemical, physical, or biological change or breakdown: unstable
Readily open to change
lability - noun
"Mr. Cheney's secret appearance as the flamboyant, crotch-grabbing fairy princess at Disney's Gay Days would seem to counter his shriveled soul's widely assumed lack of lability and feeling."

lachrymose
Given to tears or weeping: tearful
Tending to cause tears: mournful
lachrymosely - adverb; lachrymosity - noun
"Next to whom would she now sleep? Over whom would she fawn and coddle? With what would she now dry-hump and shudder and moan? Over what would she coo and titter and sigh? Verily, Lynne Cheney's lachrymosity knew no bounds as she watched her favorite personal warhead, "Lynney's Dream," being shipped off to the Gulf."

larmoyant
Tearful, weeping
"President Cheney's joyous display of larmoyant bliss as he watched the nation's poor people be brushed under the sociopolitical rug was sufficient stimulation to cause his pacemaker to kick over to mega-sinister mode."

lycoperdon
Puffball fungus
lycoperdaceous, lycoperdoid; - adj
"That vaguely evil puffy black thing growing atop Senator Lott's head is not a frightening alien-like lycoperdaceous outgrowth. It is, in fact, his really awful toupee."

ligneous
Of or resembling wood
"Mr. Hogan's presence on screen is indeed bafflingly charming and witty, in an utterly ligneous sort of way."

limacine
Of, relating to, or resembling a slug.
"I wasn't convinced of Shrub's more disturbing and limacine characteristics until I saw him tongue-kissing John Ashcroft."

loimic
Pertaining to plague
"President Cheney's attempt at a viral and loimic spread of sexless gun-sucking ultraconservative ideology was met with a solid and studied wall of middle-finger wagging."

logogogue
Person laying down the law about words
"Pookie Meat-A-Licious -- that was my nickname for Mr. Hanssen -- was a real logogogue about words and made me refer to him as 'Big Daddy' during our, um, naked 'prayer' sessions."

logorrhea
Excessive talkativeness or wordiness.
By his own measure, he is a man of many contradictions, beginning with the fact that he is famous as a listener but suffers from "a touch of logorrhea." He is so voluble that one wonders how his subjects get a word in edgewise.
It's also not good if your date has logorrhea.
"Mr. King, who possesses an enviable superabundance of imagination, suffers from a less enviable logorrhea."

loricate
Cover with a protective layer; encrust; plate
lorication - noun
"We must move quickly to protect ourselves against the scourges of depravity, loricate our society against the vile Cher dolls and the gay Tom Cruises of the world. As Attorney General, I promise to suppress my horsey-play and jackboot fetishes long enough to work to that end, so far as you know."

louche
Not reputable or decent; morally dubious
"I also found Jesse Helms' constant furtive whispery comments to me about how his leather thong keeps bunching up to be louche and repugnant."

lutulent
Thick, muddy
lutulence - noun
"Like Satan's own Twinky was the lovely Lynne Cheney, saccharine heavily shellaked shiny creepy toxic chemical sweetness on the outside, slightly rancid lutulent bloodless creaminess on the inside."

magniloquent adj
Lofty or grandiose in speech or expression; using a high-flown style of discourse; bombastic

marplot noun
one who frustrates or ruins a plan or undertaking by meddling
"What is the use of my taking the vows and settling everything as it should be, if that marplot Hans comes and upsets it all?" (George Eliot, Daniel Deronda)

misanthrope noun
a person who hates or distrusts humankind
"Moliere's 1666 satiric comedy Le Misanthrope portrays the life of Alceste, a misanthrope who is completely intolerant of society and everyone in it."

macradenous
With large glands
"Yes! Yes! Orchestrate a deadly bombing run on my hot swarthy evildoing nation, my pulsing hunk of macradenous love sausage!" cried Lynne Cheney, as Rummy wiggled the shower massager even more vigorously".

meliorism
The belief that the world tends to become better and that humans can aid its betterment
meliorist - adj or noun; melioristic - adj
"I was a devout optimist and meliorist until I saw President Cheney lick his lips when discussing the idea of drilling for oil in Alaska. Now I've turned back to drugs, reading and porn, seeking hope."

meme \meem\ noun
an idea, behavior, style, or usage that spreads from person to person within a culture
"Blogs are an interesting way... of seeing which ideas, memes, trends and news events are getting the most comment." (Clive Thompson, quoted in the Sunday Tribune)

monoglot
A person who only knows one language
"You've got your multilingual folk and your monoglots, and then there's Shrub."

morcellate
Divide into small portions; morcellation - noun
"OK boys, let's morcellate this baby: Powell, you take resigned alarmism. Condi, you take vague reassurances to the media. Ashcroft, you take scary personal freedom crackdowns. Mr. President, you take addressing the nation like they're all in 4th grade. OK, break."

mucid
slimy, moudly, musty
"I may not know much about science, but I do know a mucid human cephalopod when I see one, Mr. DeLay."

nictitate
To wink
And every time Rummy mentioned the word "nuclear" or "arsenal" or "launch the offensive" or "big throbbing warheads" or even "hot swarthy angry Iraqis" during the press conference, he would glance over at Lynne Cheney who would grin and lick her gums and nictitate like a spasming ferret and wiggle her hips and Rummy would get all flustered and flushed and gross out everyone in the room. "

narcokleptocracy
An elite or dominant group of people whose wealth derives from the trade in illegal drugs and other organized criminal activities; a government dominated by such a group.
"Bush & Co"

nugation
Triviality, trifling; pointless or meaningless speech or action; The act or practice of trifling

niddering
A cowardly person; a wretch.
"I Nancy Reagan hereby dedicate this enormous manly nuclear-powered aircraft carrier to all you niddering anti-war liberals -- p.s,; Eat my dust, baby."

objurgation
objurgate - verb transitive
objurgatory - adj
"The tirades and paranoid objurgations of the fast-food leviathan known as McDonald's do not thwart my cause! I am French! I very much like sheep! Justice is nigh!"

obnubilate
Becloud, obscure
obnubilation - noun
"I am and we are certainly really umm, not like trying to obnobi--, obniber--, oblubi--, murk up the issue of egreger--, egregari-- egregem--, um, all the bad corporate wrongdoing, nosirree, boom boom Iraq everyone maybe forget Enron and Harken and Halliburton and WorldCom, K? Please? Evildoers bad! America good! Laura where's my pudding?"

oculogyric
Of or relating to the turning of the eyeballs in the sockets.
"And then when he actually said 'No weapons formed against me shall prosper', we all suffered the same oculogyric experience, which is to say, we all rolled our eyes and groaned."

offscouring
Someone rejected by society: outcast
Something that is scoured off: refuse
"Give those sad little tree-munchin' offscourings their own state and pretty soon every pack of fur-trappin' border jockeys will want their own tax code."

olid
Evil-smelling, fetid
"No, that shockingly olid reek is not some horrid combination of rotting broccoli, decaying roadkill, and motor oil. That's just President Cheney's girdle."

oscitancy
The act of yawning
The state of being drowsy or inattentive; dullness.
"The president's glassy-eyed look and obvious frequent state of mushy oscitancy is *not* a direct result of him being a total goober, but is rather due to a lack of sufficient nap-time following his morning pudding cup. But thank you for asking, Ms. Ivins."

ossify verb
to become or change into bone or bony tissue OR to become or make hardened or set in one's ways
"Bushy Baby was open to new ideas in his youth, but his mind has ossified as the years have passed and he's now an inflexible curmudgeon."

palooka noun
an inexperienced or incompetent boxer , an oaf, lout
"Before Ali, they say, boxing was just a bunch of palookas punching each other."

proclivity
an inclination or predisposition toward something; especially a strong inherent inclination toward something objectionable
Our proclivity to remember things selectively, often means that memory simply cannot be relied on.
propensity - suggesting an often uncontrollable inclination,
penchant - an irresistible attraction
predilection -A predisposition to choose or like; an established preference.

peregrinate
To travel on foot: walk : To walk or travel over: traverse
peregrination - noun
"Nothing I like better than to get nicely liquored up and peregrinate through a swell cornfield maze, swatting flies and worshipping the moon people."

paralogism
A fallacious or illogical argument
"Madonna sure has loads of talent. Or is that just me spouting drunken paralogisms again?"

persiflage noun
frivolous bantering talk : light raillery
"When the cooking segment ran short, Greta and her cohost turned to persiflage to fill up the time left until the commercial break."

perspicacious
Having or showing penetrating mental discernment; clear-sighted.

philippic
A discourse or declamation full of bitter condemnation: a tirade
"Please ignore Mr. Rumsfeld's odd and rather disturbing philippic regarding severe spankings if anyone ever borrows his favorite boxer shorts, the ones with the little pictures of Tomahawk missiles on them."

pnigophobia
Morbid fear of being smothered
"While President Cheney adores the idea of being swarmed and smothered by all the members of all the popular teen boy bands, sometimes his acute pnigophobia kicks in and he starts screaming in tongues. Just ignore it and keep groping."

pisiform
Resembling a pea in size or shape
"When Bush appointed Condoleeza Rice as Secretary of Weird Scary Brainy Chicks Way, Way Smarter Than Me," we all realized just how mentally pisiform he really is."

prandial
Of or relating to a meal.

prurient
Inordinately interested in matters of sex; lascivious.
Characterized by an inordinate interest in sex: prurient thoughts.
Arousing or appealing to an inordinate interest in sex: prurient literature.

pule
To whine; whimper.

quidnunc
A person who seeks to know all the latest news or gossip: a busybody
"My mother is an incurable quidnunc and would love it if I wore a cell phone with a built-in tracking device at all times."

quodlibetic
Pedantic, academic, bookish, scholastic
"Clearly Dr. Carlyle considers himself some sort of quodlibetic medical genius. But his signature looks like he was dropped on his head at an early age."

querulous
habitually complaining; also, expressing complaint

recondite adj
Difficult to understand; Concerned with obscure subject matter.
"And his fondness for stopping his readers short in their tracks with evidence of his recondite vocabulary is wonderfully irritating."

redaction
an act or instance of putting something in writing or adapting it for publication , a work that has been adapted for publication : edition, version
"Tina was introduced to a number of literary classics as a child via age-appropriate redactions, sometimes in the style of comic books."

refulgence noun
a radiant or resplendent quality or state : brilliance
"Cervantes' Don Quixote compares his beloved's hair to "threads of the brightest gold of Araby, whose refulgence dimmed the sun himself."

rictus
the gape of a bird's mouth ; a gaping grin or grimace
"The mouths of millions of intelligent people all over the world gaped in a kind of painful rictus when Bush smirked his way to victory."

sabulous
Gritty; sandy
"It was as though you could push right through her, just stick a finger into that pale doughy sabulous flesh and feel nothing but dust and lint and maybe some shards of broken glass, thus making you wonder how Lynne Cheney managed to remain animate and upright at all, and then you remembered, oh yes, that's right, demons. "

senescence noun
the state of being old : the process of becoming old
"Refusing to be overcome by senescence, his mother continued to play tennis every Tuesday well into her seventies."

sinecure noun
an office or position that requires little or no work and that usually provides an income
"The organization recently restructured its workforce, eliminating several positions that had become mere sinecures."

saxicolous
Inhabiting or growing among rocks
"Little-known fact that Tom DeLay's deeply frightening hairpiece is actually a rare saxicolous fungi imported from Turkey."

sectile
Capable of being severed by a knife with a smooth cut
sectility - noun
"When yer flingin' around one o' them badass 3-foot long DragonSlayer broadswords from the Knife Collector's Show, their ain't nothin' in the world that don't appear as choppable, sliceable, or otherwise sectile, as you can see by what's left of our cat."

soigne \swahn-YAY\ adj
Dressed with great care and elegance : well-groomed, sleek , elegantly maintained or designed
"Wearing a fetching evening gown, Alyssa looked soigne and sophisticated and ready for a night on the town."

splenetic adj
marked by bad temper, malevolence, or spite
"Phil's review of the book was written with a harsh, splenetic tone that did little to conceal his preexisting grudge against the author."

supererogation
The act of performing more than is required by duty, obligation, or need
"I thought it was a totally generous but still rather inappropriate supererogation when the kindly wizard encountered my level 6 half-gnome in the Forest of Darkness and offered to perform 'magical oral gratification.'"

susurrate
To issue soft noises; to whisper
susurrant - adj; susurrous - adj; susurration - noun
"Shrub always breaks into uncontrollable giggles when Laura gets partially naked and makes those small, susurrous noises in his ear in bed late at night, pretending to imitate President Cheney's heavy breathing when discussing oil drilling rights."

suspire
To draw a long deep breath: to sigh heavily
"Always thought wheezing and coughing was sort of an L.A. tradition, growing up. Hell, I couldn't suspire properly until I was about 37."

soidisant \swah-dee-ZAHNG (the final "NG" isn't pronounced, but the vowel is nasalized)\ adj
self-proclaimed, so-called
"Meredith is a soidisant gourmet, but her cooking doesn't approach the quality demonstrated by the chefs she is so quick to criticize."

tabescent
Progressively wasting away
tabescence - noun
"Given our society's increasingly tabescent hopes for any sign of sagacious humanitarianism from the Shrub Administration, we have decided to legalize Ecstasy to alleviate everyone's pain."

tantivy
tantivy - noun, plural: tantivies.
"Eyes glazed and breathing heavily and moaning phrases from the nuclear fuel rod-handling manual and apparently imagining herself riding at a hearty and bouncy tantivy, Lynne Cheney would invariably mount and then grind the arm of the poor Oval Office couch every time she entered the room, medication depending."

teratoid
Resembling a monster; grotesquely deformed.
"Well here's the problem right here, doctor. Mr. Cheney's soul is clearly dark and bilous and rather teratoid. Shall we remove what remains of it?"

tendentious
marked by a tendency in favor of a particular point of view : biased
"I always suspected I was getting a highly tendentious version of the town's notorious family feud from my mother, who worked for one of the families for many years."

threnody noun
a song of lamentation for the dead : an elegy
"In the opera's final scene, the leading lady sings a threnody to mourn the murdered king."

trenchant
keen, sharp : vigorously effective and articulate; caustic : sharply perceptive : penetrating : clear-cut, distinct
"The great detective solved his cases by means of trenchant observation and reasoning, and every once in a while by means of plain old luck."

trumpery noun
worthless nonsense :trivial or useless articles : junk
"Dick's desk in the bunker is crammed with souvenirs, paperweights, and other such trumpery."

titubate
To reel, stagger, totter, wheel
titubation - noun - The staggering or stumbling gait characteristic of certain nervous disorders
"Sheesh !, one whiff of a spent nuclear rod and President Cheney starts giggling and titubating all over the Oval Office like a drunken schoolgirl."

truckle
To act in a subservient manner: submit
"And don't forget the shot of rat's blood and the croissant and little butter patties this time, you ungrateful fescennine snotnosed truckler!" a bloated and supine President Cheney yelled after Junior, chuckling, as the latter scurried breathlessly out of the room to go fix breakfast. "

ultrafidian
Going beyond faith
"It would require a remarkable ultrafidian leap to imagine President Cheney will ever reveal the true depths of his deep and abiding love for that totally gay Tom Cruise movie 'Top Gun'."

ululate
To howl, wail, lament loudly
ululation - noun
"Anti-choice crusader John Ashcroft becomes Attorney General, the souls of ten million women ululate in pain."

urticant
Causing itching or stinging.
"Shrub the leader of the free world, Shrub the policy-maker, Shrub the great cultural urticant."

uxorious
excessively fond of or submissive to a wife

vanward adj
located in the vanguard : advanced
"Joint venturing opportunities now exist for vanward companies in a variety of industries, especially other financial services businesses and retailing."

vernal adj
of, relating to, or occurring in the spring, fresh or new like the spring; also : youthful
"The stream began to murmur by the door, and the fragrance of growing herbs and flowers came softly on the vernal breeze."

vicissitude noun
the quality or state of being changeable : natural change or mutation, visible in nature or in human affairs; alternating change ; succession
"You have to be able to withstand financial losses to weather the vicissitudes of the stock market."

welter verb
writhe, toss , wallow ; to rise and fall or toss about in or with waves ; to become deeply sunk, soaked, or involved